In sickness and in health, Love remains

Vishu Rita Krocha
Kohima | February 13  

Aneile Kenye lies in her hospital bed in the Intensive Care Unit (ICU), Naga Hospital Kohima, quite oblivious of the world outside but never without somebody by her side, caring, loving and watching over her. It’s been almost 8 years since she was diagnosed with brain tumor (meningioma) on June 20, 2009- a day, her husband, Oken Jeet Sandham would recall as “devastating” but not without hope.  

When the couple fell in love at first sight and later married in October 1986, little did they realize that the diagnosis would change their entire course of life. They were married for 23 blissful years, doing things that they both love - especially martial arts - which was quite unmistakably a common passion they shared and excelled in, until the day she collapsed and everything changed.  

Aneile Kenye underwent surgery at GNRC Guwahati on July 4, 2009 that lasted for about 11 hours, followed by a re-surgery the very next day. Then, on her road to recovery, they were obviously happy to be back in Kohima after a few weeks although it meant the left side of her body was paralyzed. Once at home, she would sit by her husband’s side in a wheel chair and watch him work. During one such moment, she told him, “I will not be alright for a very long time and will not be in a position to help you raise our two children or do other things. I know you are very busy but if possible, please finish the book.”  

This very book titled, “Naga Paddy Man to the World” written by her husband, Oken Jeet Sandham, Editor of North East Press Service (NEPS) and Secretary General of the International Muaythai Alliance Federation Inc (IMAFI) was launched in November 2011, fulfilling a long cherished dream of his wife and is about a “giant paddy variety” discovered by his father-in-law, Pastor Melhite Kenye.  

Those were also the last words she had spoken before she slipped into a coma in the later part of August 2009 and has ever since remained in the ICU at Naga Hospital Kohima. Having literally grown up in that environment, their two children have also found a second home in the hospital, the only place where their family comes full circle. The son, Reagain has matured when the mother was diagnosed but Oken Jeet Sandham feels it’s painful for the daughter-Elizabeth, even as he related that she was only about eleven years old during that time and is now pursuing her B.A 2nd Semester. “How happy my mother would be to see me all grown up now!” were her sentiments.  

Through all these years of caring and loving, the greatest challenge for Oken Jeet Sandham is “not losing your hope.” “I have truly come to know what love is and I tell my children- ‘if we are not able to show people what love is after living here in the hospital for so long, it will be a disaster’”, he expresses. They continue to share and celebrate so many beautiful family moments in the hospital one of which is her birthday that falls on December 12.  

“What a journey it has been!” he looks back on while putting across thoughts that have often crossed his mind- “Can I live in the hospital forever? Should I have a prototype hospital and have a permanent staff in my house?  

But if there is anything that has been constant through it all, then it is unmistakably love, even as they have gone on to draw valuable lessons from the experience. “My children and I, we are all in the same boat- we have grown stronger together in every way. God is very wonderful- there is always somebody by her side and I hope she will be alright”, he expresses with optimism.  

“So far, nobody has stayed in this hospital for this long- and to stay several years, she has made a record,” Dr. K. Angami remarks while also sharing that “the family has also suffered a lot psychologically, financially, emotionally… along with her, the family has also endured through hard times but overall they have been very supportive for the past 8 years.”  

“Medically speaking, she is more or less stable especially vitals recovery but neurological paralysis will last a lifetime. Her memory and thoughts are affected most of the time but there is no immediate threat to her life,” the doctor enlightens.  

Senior Grade Specialist, Dr. Sentimeren Aonok also observes that the neurological outcome has not been very encouraging but says that it has been very satisfactory in other forms and goes on to add, “We are hoping that one day- we believe in miracle of miracles- that some sense of recognition will come.”