Easterine Kire
I know it has become quite the thing to send around an embarrassing picture of a public leader on social media handles like WhatsApp and others. I recently received a picture that had been ‘forwarded many times.’ It was a public leader blowing his nose while attending a public event. There was nothing humorous or particularly striking about the picture that could warrant it being circulated many times. The intent behind it was ridicule. The person who took the picture needs to be pulled up and not the leader in the photo. The whole action begs the question, What about privacy then? Is the camera going to be allowed to invade every part of our lives, including the times when we are performing bodily functions that everyone else performs such as blowing our noses and more? It is possible that the public leader had forgotten to carry tissues, thereby necessitating this action. And it certainly was not an aberrant action. Why forward it again? What gratification does the sender get in showing such a picture?
It is not funny. It has gone beyond the male adolescent idea of a joke where embarrassing pictures of the groomare circulated at a wedding during the best man’s speech. The wrong use of the phone camera is simply demeaning. We are better than that. We can delete the picture when it reaches us. We can tell the sender it was a violation of privacy, because that is what it is, and we can play our part in spreading ethical treatment of other people.
After Women’s Day
After the hoo-ha about Women’s Day, what should we do next? It would be wonderful if schools could impart certain values in the classroom that young students can carry home and nurture. Because in some sections of our society, evenin this day and age, there are some people who still say, Maiki khan kamnai. It is such an interesting statement. How do we work with that? Where do such mindsets come from? Do they originate from one of our three centres -the home or the school or the church? Wherever it comes from, we need to work with that statement. Take it apart and let its deconstruction lead to a mindset that is healthier for all generations.
Schools, let us teach that the value of a girl-child is equal to that of a boy-child. Let us encourage girls’ football and girls’ boxing, especially for those girls who want it. Let’s raise girl carpenters and girl auto mechanics and girl rally drivers and encourage them in all the arenas that have so far been off limits to girls. Let us not limit our girls. At the same time, let us not box them into roles that they are expected to fulfil. They don’t deserve that. No girl should grow up hearing that she is supposed to do all the work in the house. No boy should grow up expecting to be served by women all the time. There is nothing wrong with work distribution at home. If the daughter of the house is cooking dinner, the son of the house can just as well wash the dishes after dinner. Tasks like fetching water used to be designated as girls’ tasks. The logic behind that is weak when a boy can carry heavier loads of water than a girl.
Another point to look at is the practice of getting a wayward son married off to ‘a good girl’ in the hopes she will change him! Ish Ram and face palm, look it even rhymes! Only the totally deviant would think an innocent young girl could change a man who is having the time of his life drinking adulterated alcohol and carousing, quite indoctrinated by the Maiki khan kamnai logic. To such girls, I just want to whisper,
You were not born to fulfil the obligation to change another person; we can only change ourselves. Don’t buy into the lie that you have the power to change your husband, or that he is an alcoholic because you failed.
Strong women won’t be enough; we need men strong in their identities who can help women get a reason to celebrate Women’s day every day. And after that is done, we can celebrate a Man’s Day too.
